the Difference?

I am usually pretty neutral about controversial topics. At least in person. I mean I defend what I believe, but I don't make too big of a deal out of it. I'm not going to change someone's mind in a few sentences about big topics. One has to be open to change for anything big to take effect. I think the only thing would be to possibly have them think a little bit about what I say.  I'm just not a fan of debating at all. I'm not good at remembering facts, or explaining those facts then. I read a lot of things, but just hard to reiterate what I read and learned and believe. I am trying to work on that, but it's hard for me.

But this... what I am about to say.. has been hanging on my heart a lot over the past few days. I can't seem to get them out of my head...these people, this situation. 

A few days ago, Friday, I think, across my phone came the news announcement that a baby fell out of a window and died. There wasn't very many details at first, but right away it made me sad. As more and more details came through over the next days, my concern for them increased and I just want to pray for them more and more.

The story... a 16 year old girl, had a baby in the early morning hours, and threw it out the window of her home. Her mom, the baby's grandmother, found out and called 911. She held the baby while doing CPR, waiting for the rescue squad. The baby, was premature, only weighing a little over 2 pounds. The mom (16yo) was a junior in high school. The news interviewed some of the family, and they had no idea that the girl was pregnant. The girl (mom), is being tried in court as an adult, and it was just determined that she would have a $500,000 bail! She has a history of running away a few years ago also.  These is the facts I know... as least as good as facts as one can get from the news.

Here are my thoughts...

My heart breaks for this young mom, this girl. Who is only a child herself. She is being tried as an adult. She is going to have this cross with her the rest of her life. People, social media, are saying, maybe she should have a psychiatric evaluation. People are saying, how could she do such a thing?! When there are so many parents who want a child so bad, and she kills this one.  People say, she should be punished.  I ask... where did WE, as adults, go wrong??!!  This is what I think, this girl, this young mother, who is still a child... looks like she had no one to trust, no one to turn to. She was so so scared. And now when she needs love and understanding the most... we put her in jail! This society of ours is messed up. Why couldn't we have helped her sooner. Sure, I know there is always way more to the story than is portrayed. I know that first hand. But... shouldn't she have been able to turn to someone for help? Teachers, mentors, family, friends, a stranger, EPS... anyone?!  And the dad of this child.. where is he?? He just goes on with life... no consequences. But she gets tried in court!  And this is what angers me the most.... this baby, lets say he or she was around 28-30 weeks maybe, was born and died by an act of abuse, of neglect. And society, as a whole, gets all worked up about it, all sorts of feelings toward the mom, family, etc. She committed a crime. (I'm not saying at all what she did was okay) But now, if this young girl would have gone to have an abortion, that morning instead, or that week before... no one would have asked any questions. People would think it's just fine. It's her right. But can I ask a question, (and pardon my language).. WHAT THE HELL IS THE DIFFERENCE??? Would someone please explain to me, what that difference is?? I have been trying to understand, but I just can't. Oh wait... is is because it's her Choice, her Right to have an abortion, but after the baby is born, it's not her choice?!? Maybe that's it..... Is that the difference. Please pardon me... but that's a bunch of baloney!!!! It's not a right, to be able to kill a human life. It's not an entitlement, like if one is claiming the baby as a piece of property. A baby is a GIFT. A gift, a blessing from God that is to be treasured, cared for, loved, and Respected within ALL stages of life! From conception to natural death!! 

So this anger, this frustration, this sadness, I have inside of me... what do I do with it? I can't scream all over Omaha. I can't fight with people about it. But I have to defend life somehow. So I've been praying a lot... for all those involved in this tragic event, for healing and peace. I've been praying a lot for the young girl, Antonia, is her name... for healing, peace, and for her to find and accept Jesus's mercy and love for her. So she comes to know how much Jesus loves her no matter what. I've been struggling some with my own knowing of faith, trust, and patience lately. So I've decided, this month of the Rosary, that every time I catch myself being anxious, worrying... to offer that up to Jesus for this young mother. Kind of like Saint Therese of Lisieux did for the prisoner she prayed for so he could know Jesus before he died. I also decided to start praying, asking God, how He wants me to use this passion for life I have, for Him? I feel, I have the need, to help others like this young girl before it is too late, but I am unsure how. So I'm going to start asking Jesus to show me how to use His love to help those who are struggling with the value of a human life. Maybe to volunteer somewhere, maybe to pray at an abortion clinic, maybe something I don't even know about yet. But I know He will show me. But in the meantime, I know I am going to keep praying for the love of Jesus, the mercy of Jesus to reach that young girl named Antonia, and pray she will get to meet her precious child again in eternity.